And They Lived Happily Ever After

Okay, it's true, we do joke about the mail that we receive here at Chat with R&R, and the skeptical reader might occasionally doubt the authenticity of some of the letters we print in our !Ask Robin & Renee! feature. For instance some might call bullshit on a certain missive we said was sent last week by that director guy, Steven Spielberg. (Though clearly you people are also the ones who deny the existence of the Tooth Fairy, fat free muffins and an affordable Manhattan apartment, you cynical bastards.) But when we did finally get around to checking our hotmail account the other day, we were floored, flabbergasted and momentarily terrified to find a REAL letter from a REAL person. (Yes, you may count us among the cynical bastards to which we refer.)

However, this letter did not just come from any person looking to increase the size of our genitalia. No. This letter came from two folks who had been featured in a prior posting on the site. Instead of summarizing, we'll reprint the letter for you (in its entirely real entirety.) But before you read the couple's response, you should probably re-familiarize yourself with the post in which they were mentioned (and that's why you'll note our initial fear of reprisal...) So here's the abridged original entry followed by the amazing response of our new best friends:

JULY 17, 2005
KGB tonight
...The former editor and writer for the New York Observer and I will be doing a reading at the much ballyhooed bar, KGB at 7 pm. For those of you thinking, "much as I love Renee and Robin--and I do, I so do--I've already seen them read before," I will tell you that not only are we reading new stuff, the chances of you meeting your soul mate at this event are tremendous! What do I mean? Well, other serious readers of the Styles wedding page will probably know of what I speak, but for those of you who aren't similarly addicted, I point your attention to p. 12 of the NYT Sunday Styles page. Because there you will learn of the nuptials of Mariah Malone and David Calarco, a cute couple who, it is noted in the final sentence of their blurb (the sentence usually reserved for the shameful admission that the groom's former marriage ended in divorce, as did the bride's previous three marriages) "met in 1998 while following Phish, the rock band, around Europe." So you've got to say hey, if these crazy kids could find one another at a Phish concert where they were undoubtedly stoned out of their fucking gourds, I don't think it's a stretch to assume you have a chance of meeting your intended in a small bar in the East Village tonight.

From : Mariah Calarco
Sent : Friday, March 17, 2006 3:34 AM
To : shakingherassets@hotmail.com
Subject : posting on your blog on 7-17-05!!!!!

Hello Ladies,
So, my husband randomly decides to Google us the other day to see if anything comes up. I think he was trying to see if our wedding website was still working. Well, it wasn't, but what he found was a million times better...The entry on your site dated July 17, 2005 had us rolling on the ground in laughter for a good half hour. Why? Because we are David Calarco & Mariah Malone (now Calarco) the couple to whom you refered in the style section of the NY Times. Boy were we surprised to read that!! You have a great sense of humor in your writing, and I just wanted to let you know how damned funny we thought that was! I immediately forwarded it to all of my friends and family because, hell, that is the closest to fame I have ever come!! Thanks for that!! I have to say I am quite curious about the reading you did at the event you were promoting that night. Anyway, just wanted to give you a shout out for giving us that pee-in-our-pants-fuckin'-funny moment- it was a lot of fun.
-Mariah Calarco

I ask you, who needs Spielberg when you've got this?