Playing "The Game"

In this week's New York Magazine, the outstanding sex columnists Em & Lo, discuss the evergreen subject of "players" in the Mating column. Thanks to Neil Strauss (the former NYT pop music writer who has also co-authored books with literary luminaries such as Marilyn Manson and Jenna Jameson) playas strolled back into the spotlight with the release of his book, The Game, a how to con women guide that this week was #10 on the NYT best seller list.

We won't waste time on The Game, per se, or bother hyperlinking to Neil because we don't want to and yes, we're just that petty--at least the Robin half of us is--but we do find Em & Lo's column really interesting. In it, the ladies essentially ask the question, "who's zooming who?," ie, aren't women by players by nature, too?

What they determine is that yes, we are. We really, really are. And I very much agree, but there is a distinction in the timing and rules of play that I think went undiscussed. Of course in a short piece there's no way they could have fit in all the nuances of the subject (clearly this is a story that could be book length...) but the final quote in their piece is from a woman who says, “[W]omen are the master manipulators. And we can get away with a lot more than men, because we’re not as obvious. Take a woman with a plan and a man with a plan and have them both follow through? The woman will always come out on top. Literally.”

My sense is that this isn't true. There's another woman who's quoted in the story who admits to being a player herself because she likes the thrill of the chase--this I buy--and this I might have even uttered myself. But, like the first girl quoted, do women always come out on top? I'm going to go with "no." Certainly not at the beginning of the game anyway because when you're "playing" there's no guarantee that you'll get to the end (if by end you mean relationship.) Sure, one person can always walk away and that's technically an end, but how does walking away put you on top?

I'm curious to hear what you, dear readers, think about this since its a subject I've already spent oodles of playing around with in my own head and years of my life batting around with others...