Wednesday, April 06, 2005

Delivered In 3 Days or Less

Hello, Happy Dragon Restaurant? Yeah, this is one very hungry customer calling you...

Now look, I don't want to make a fuss cause normally you guys are frighteningly prompt with your deliveries -- in fact, most days I shudder to think how quickly you make it to my door with the piping hot mooshu -- but this is ridiculous. I placed my order for that Chicken Chow Fun THREE DAYS ago!

What's that? Your delivery guy has gone missing? Uh-huh, yeah, that's a drag. But maybe you're not appreciating my dilemma here. See, a girl's got to eat. And all I've got in my fridge are a wedge of brie, a bottle of champagne and some pudding pops.

What's that? You think there might have been foul play? Uh-huh, yeah, so maybe you could send one of your more reliable delivery guys over then because I'm like starving to death over here.

Okay, so are we clear? No, of course, yeah, extend my deepest concern to the guy's wife in China. So can you include an extra set of chopsticks in my order? Okay, that's great, thanks. Oh, and I expect you'll be giving me some of those sesame noodles for free, right? I mean, three days I've been waiting for this delivery!

3 Hungry Days For Deliveryman Stuck In Elevator


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