Friday, March 24, 2006

The Family That RVs Together...

It was reported this week that a family was stuck in a snow-trapped RV for 17 days before being rescued. Getting by on a diet of melted snow and dehydrated food, the family of six sang songs, prayed, and watched TV until finally found by some park rangers. As noted in the picture, everyone emerged unscathed and, more improbably, smiling.

Now I’m happy for the Stivers. And no doubt they were elated after being rescued. But I’m going to have to call bullshit on this one. Seventeen days stuck in an RV with your family and you walk out smiling? Uh, death first, anyone? I mean, how many of us get the shakes after just two days at home for Thanksgiving, excusing ourselves repeatedly from dinner to make frantic suicide hotline-esque phone calls to friends while smoking and pacing in the driveway? Gentle readers, indulge me in this experiment. Close your eyes and imagine yourself in a 8x15 tin room with wall to wall carpeting. Your mother is standing over you, running her fingers through your hair, and saying – on loop – “honey, if you just got a decent haircut maybe you wouldn’t still be single and so lonely.” How long would you last? Or her, for that matter. And I’m not sure if having a TV would have helped much. I frankly would have kneecapped my sister by nightfall if she didn’t cough up the remote willingly.

So cheers to the Stivers. God bless your good fortune. Because if it was my family stuck in that RV, I’m not so sure everyone’s walking out.


Anonymous Cory said...

Well, so much for their good fortune: they are now wanted in Arizona on drug and weapons charges.

The drug charge might explain why they were all smiles...but then again, if they had shotguns AND meth with them its even more of a miracle that they are still alive!

March 24, 2006 2:36 PM  
Blogger Jay said...

Amen, Cory.

And it must have been meth. Had it been pot and all they had to eat was dehydrated food, i'm thinking they would have turned to cannibalism by day two.

March 24, 2006 4:36 PM  
Blogger Renée said...

nice sleuthing, Cory! this is a delicious news. these poor mo-fo's were probably just enjoying a little respite from the law.

March 24, 2006 4:55 PM  
Anonymous Houstonian said...

The publicity from their rescue led law enforcement right to their front door, so to speak. Apparently, they'd entered an agreement to agree to turn state's evidence against the "real" owners of the illicit stash before going on the lam. So now, some dangerous drug dealers know that these people were planning to turn on them. All in all, they probably should have taken a different route to the camp ground.

March 25, 2006 9:32 PM  
Blogger Love Kpop said...

I am looking for my memories through the stories, the narrative of people. I feel it is difficult but I will try.

February 20, 2018 9:16 PM  

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