Coalition of the Caped and Willing
For those of you who don’t follow the world of comic books (and, really, who over the age of 14 should), news broke this week that the caped crusader, Batman, has enlisted in the fight against terrorism. That’s right, writer Frank Miller announced that Batman will join the Coalition of the Willing (which currently comprises Poland…and?) and help fight the war on terror. According to Miller, the new comic, entitled “Holy Terror, Batman,” is an intentional piece of propaganda that will depict Batman “kicking al-Qaeda’s ass.” Because, as Miller sees it, "it just seems silly to chase around the Riddler when you've got al-Qaeda out there."
Now, I have some misgivings about depicting the war in Iraq in cartoon form as it seems to almost trivialize the horrors occurring daily. But I’m sure Miller’s heart is in the right place for wanting to combat terror in the pages of his trusted comic book. And with recruiting stations about as popular as a weekend tax seminar these days, we could use all the help we can get. But, why stop at Batman? As a former Saturday morning cartoon junkie (firmly planted three feet away from television, cereal bowl in hand, and no, mom, I don’t want to go outside and play), I’m well aware of the many superhero resources we have at our disposal. So, Miller, how about employing the entire League of Justice in our struggle?
Wonder Woman: Throw that Lasso of Truth where it’s needed most – at our Commander-in-Chief. Dig in those red hooker boots and demand the answers we’ve all been seeking for the past five years: “Where the hell are those weapons of mass destruction?”
Wonder Twins: Although only teenagers, there appear to be no more age restrictions for enlisting. So welcome aboard, kids. Wonder twin powers activate! Form of… proper body armor! Shape of…a coherent post-invasion strategy!
Robin: Oh, wait, not you Robin. Sorry, Boy Wonder. No one’s asked, but, really, does he even need to tell? Rules are rules and I’m afraid he’s going to have to sit this one out.
So best of luck Super Friends. Because if you can't do it, Scooby-Doo and the gang better start outfitting the Mystery Van with bulletproof glass.