Thank God I'm Not Rich and Famous
A clarification: In light of my recently posted wish list, it might seem like I crave such tried-and-true cliches as being rich and famous. I would just like to clarify that, despite wishing for a wee bit more income and a little bit more Money, Status and Power, I don't want to be rich and famous.
In any case, it's not like increasing my income by 50%--which was my modest specification--would even fucking make me close to rich. And it's not a little power and status would do much more than raise me from pathetic anonymity to, say, anonymity. Certainly not famous.
Which is good because I don't want to be rich and famous anyway--in fact, I thank God I'm not rich and famous, because if I were rich and famous I might say some unbelievably stupid things, not unlike what the very rich and famous Celine Dion said to Larry King in the aftermath of hurricane Katrina, when she gushed and cried and gave free reign to her compassion, explaining to Larry that some of those looters in New Orleans were so poor they had probably never even touched a television. Watch the video, it's delicious. Celine is so out of touch, so phenomenally, hilariously embarassing to herself, you wanna take the poor dear by the hand and ask if she's heard of modern innovations like telephones and motorcars and refrigeration. It's just so terribly isolating being rich and famous, n'est-ce-pas, ma Celine?
So, here's to poverty and obscurity and touching televisions.