Sunday, July 17, 2005

Are You There God? It's Me...


And I gotta tell you, I'm a little worried. It's late right now, on a Sunday night, and I should really be getting to bed soon. But, God, I'm worried that if I go to bed I won't be able to fall asleep, that I'll toss and turn, thinking about tomorrow. See tomorrow's sort of like the first day of school: I'm already showered, I have my outfit all picked out--except for the shoes, I can't decide between the gold flats and the pointy-toed slingbacks, but I feel like I'll wake up tomrrow and I'll know, you know, I'll know which shoes feel right--and I know exactly what time to leave the house. See, after a strange and delicious few weeks of working from home, I start a new gig tomorrow, and I have to go back to an office. It's sort of like graduating to high school from junior high--there'll be this new cafeteria where face-time matters, bigger badder popular girls, and restrooms where people gossip. Oh, and there'll also be real work to do, and homework and stuff, and I might get called on in a meeting or something. I'll have to perform and stuff. And I'll for sure be introduced to, like, everyone: the New Girl. Please, God, don't make this minor little spot on my chin morph into anything nasty overnight.

But see, God, all that's not what what has me worried. At all. It's a job , an office, a fancy Lucent phone--love it. God, see, I'm worried because...BECAUSE I HAVE TO BE THERE AT 8:00 a.m. AND I DON'T THINK I'VE LEFT THE HOUSE THAT EARLY SINCE I LAST REPORTED TO HOMEROOM IN 1990. I think Saab Turbos were a hot car then, and no one had ever heard of low-rider pants or email.

I mean, God, what if I'm late tomorrow--if I get there at 8:05, do I have to go the attendance office and get a late pass?


Anonymous God said...

My child Renée, a few suns have set since I left my holy words for you here but nowhere are those found.

Hence, I once again say to thee:

Thou shall not worry for it will benefit you not.

July 19, 2005 8:38 PM  
Blogger Robin said...

Hey God! How's it going? Now that we have you on the line here, just wondering if you could give us a little insight about a second book deal? No rush, of course, but if we could get something sewn up by end of summer, that'd be super.
Thanks, dude!

July 20, 2005 9:29 AM  
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